Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric disorder most commonly characterized by a subject's obsessive, distressing, intrusive thoughts and related compulsions which attempt to neutralize the obsessions. Thus it is an anxiety disorder.
The typical OCD sufferer performs tasks to seek relief from obsession-related anxiety. To others, these tasks may appear odd and unnecessary. But for the sufferer, such tasks can feel critically important, and must be performed in particular ways to ward off dire consequences and to stop the stress from building up. Examples of these tasks: repeatedly checking that one's parked car has been locked before leaving it; turning lights on and off a set number of times before exiting a room; repeatedly washing hands at regular intervals throughout the day.
Most OCD sufferers are aware that such thoughts and behavior are not rational, but feel bound to comply with them to fend off feelings of panic or dread. Because sufferers are consciously aware of this irrationality but feel helpless to push it away, untreated OCD is often regarded as one of the most vexing and frustrating of the major anxiety disorders.
OCD can be treated with Behavioral therapy, Cognitive therapy, medications, or any combination of the three. Psychotherapy can also help in some cases, while not one of the leading treatments. According to the Expert Consensus Guidelines for the Treatment of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, the treatment of choice for most OCD is behavior therapy or cognitive behavior therapy.
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Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
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- OCD / General Anxiety Disorder / Depression experiences from Hope Cube members.
Having OCD myself now for over 25 years, and knowing the various forms that the obsessions and compulsions tend to take while having OCD (only to wax and wane in intensity), I was wondering if anyone out there would be willing to share their personal story regarding OCD.
I am most interested in the symptoms that they have dealt with during the course of their affliction and how they may or may not have progressed.
For example, my condition developed from wanting to keep everyday objects (paper, books, items in drawers, etc.) in neat orderly lines as if they were arranged on a grid. This developed into repetitive handwashing (probably around 50 to 100 times a day), to having to hold my breath for a certain timeperiod if I passed by someone's house who was a "stoner" while in junior high school (I know, I know ... very odd. I knew it was odd at the time, but I had to do it or I didn't feel "right". Felt like I could become contaminated by being near their house). This then progressed into 1+ hour showers in order to decontaminate myself. Then it changed into having to wear the same clothing all of the time because other clothes didn't feel right. I have had to do certain counting rituals when getting up or sitting down in a chair or walking through a doorway. This includes having to unwind what I can only term my "internal compass" if I have to turn my body around for some reason. For example, if I were to turn clockwise during the course of an activity, I would feel like my perspective or center of mass was off balance or askew. I would then have to rotate in the opposite direction to rebalance the wound feeling.
Fear of germs or contaminating myself has allowed me to become very adept at opening doors with my elbows or longsleeve shirts pulled down over my hands, turning on water faucets with my elbows, flushing the toilet or urinal with my feet, to God forbid, using a public telephone cradled in my shirtsleeve covered hands with the receiver held far from my face.
I have had to keep all of my clothes in my closet lined up perfectly spaced apart on their respective hangers, and grouped according to size and colour. Pants and shirts (even tee shirts) were ironed to absolute smoothness. Creases had to be "just so" or I'd have to redo the process. Clothing contained within drawers are folded with military exactness and stacked perfectly in rows according to size and usage. Shoes are perfectly shined and assorted by usage.
Books and other items are stacked on 90 degree perpendicular rows by size, thickness, and covers (hardback or softcover). Toiletries in the bathroom are the same way. Q-tips are stacked like little rows of sardines in a can. And so on and so forth.
What has bothered me now for the last several years is intrusive thoughts or images that pop into my mind that I have absolutely no desire to dwell on or analyze. They are at total odds to my behavioral makeup. I have to "unthink" them if that is possible. Once again, this sounds very strange, but if you have OCD, this possibly sounds familiar. All of this takes up a remarkable amount of time and mental energy. The majority of the time I don't even want to get out of bed. This has gone on for many years. I've taken several different medications specifically geared toward treating OCD and depression, but either I experienced sever side effects, or the medication seemed to lose potency after awhile. I currently am taking 200 mg. of Zoloft and it has seemed to help a bit ... it kind of blunts the severity of the agitation that I can experience with OCD. However, even now, this has also waned in due time. Needless to say, all of this, combined with a generalized anxiety disorder and clinical depression has made life very unbearable at times. I have had my mouth over the business end of a shotgun with my thumb on the trigger and have put a pistol to my head many, many times while in private.
Well in closing here, first off, I'd like to thank you for having read all of the above this far. Thank you. And secondly, please take the time if you will to share your personal experiences with OCD, or for that matter, depression or anxiety issues.
Take care and I look forward to your replies. Hang in there everyone.
Peace,
august242
Asked By: [august242]
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