Try not to feel bad about the situation, and never mind the people who can't understand. Sometimes a retreat is necessary to regroup and recharge. You'll be interested in going out again when you're ready. I've been there and trying to force and judging yourself only makes it harder.

If you lose to yourself before the battle has begun, how can you win the war? Don't put down yourself first. You are fine. What other people judge doesn't truly make you who you are. Your mom for example, call you nasty things, but does it really matter? Does it change anything? No, hell no, it doesn't. Trying and at your own pace is the best thing to do. Don't be completely oblivious, however, don't get blown away by other people's words! Good luck!

I know exactly how you feel. Because my doctor has been changing my medicines around now I can't drive anymore so I am stuck in my house all of the time. I hate it in here. I would give you some advice on how to reach out to other people or make friends, but I have no idea how to do it myself. There are other people who feel just like you do. Try asking your therapist if they have some kind of group therapy available. When I was in the hospital I had to go to group therapy everyday and I found that that helped me, and I also heard about/became acquainted with other people who know "what I mean."