Euphoria-koiobito's Profile
- Sex: Female
- Age: 16
- Location:
Brampton, 77426
Recent Questions Euphoria-koiobito is Interested In
Issues Euphoria-koiobito is Interested In
- Asthma - I've had astma for ever it seems, but it hasnt been that bad since about grade 6, but it still bothers me when Im runnig for stuff like gym or sports. it sucks. I remember once in grade 9, i kinda took to much of my puffer and i couldn't breathe properly. My ex took me to the office, and so i became better, but i dont kno if using a puffer is such a great idea for me...
- Food Allergy - I hate my allergies. People are so carefull around me and are too afraid to eat or let me eat some things. I live with peanut butter in my house I actually wash dishes with peanut butter all over them,, but my friends think that if i smell it i'll die, that's not my case but it's my friends case unfortunatly for her...:S
- Shyness - Im so shy around people I dont kno and people i have a crush on. It doesnt really bother me, it's just that people think that im something else until I get used to them and act like me. It takes time for them to ajust to me but people's reactions to the way that I usually am are kinda overboard...
- Anemia - I really hate how my parents think that i can function like a normal person because everybodies' tired in the morning. Nuh uh, it's 10X harder to wake up in the morning when your anemic, and whenever i do get up in the morning, I tend to go to bed earlier, and my parents dont really handle that in the best of ways, which makes me wonder do they ever try to understand what Im going through? Do i always want to fall asleep at 5pm? no. i dont.
- Depression - my story explains it all. my parents are the problem, my ex was the solution, but because he was subtracted out of the equation,i have no solution.i hardly see any of my friends, just in the mornings and afternoons of school days. I should really plan a movie night... but other tahn that I feel really alone. I want to trust people and be trusted so that I dont have to feel this way anymore.
- Suicide - I've tried many times to end my life but the support and love of all my friends keeps me alive. If it wasnt for them I wouldn't be here. Im hoping to find more help from people at this site as well.
- Environmental Allergy - In the beginning of summer, my eyes were so scratchy, i couldnt see and my eyes were preactically blood shot. it was so gross... This is the first time it happened so i hope it doesnt again...
- Homosexuality - Im not completely gay, I'm..half..? Bisexual that is. My boyfriend was okay with it, and only 2 other friends kno. Im just afraid to be out about it. Even though Im bi.
- Low Self Esteem - Im a horrible person. It's simple as that. I kno i have some good in me and that im pretty good looking, but socially it doesnt show, and for some reason i base myself off of that. I kno im weird, but sometimes i think that everyone secretly hates me and dont like me and use me for what reason i dont kno, but that's my suspision with some people...I just have so many scars on my body, so most of the time i cover up, even in the summer when everyone's wearing their tang tops and t-shirts...
- Phobia - Im afraid of alot of things taht eveyone's like um, why?? like vomit:S and spiders but thats common...And i am also afraid of when people wet or crap themselves, I find it so scary and disgusting. I cant be around people who have an 'accident' I dont kno why Im afraid its just so gross>:S Most of the time when people have the stomach flue i stay far away from them for an average of 1-2 weeks. I'd talk to them.. but on the internet or something. The only exception was my ex, but even then I was like not talking to him directly. I stayed away from him for 3 days, and i didnt touch him at all. but when christmas comes around my brothers always get sick so i dont talk to them for the whole christmas break. Another strange fear..Seaguls. I cant be under them because I am afraid they may poop on me, this is annoying when Im outside with my friends because Im constantly moving around looking up in the sky watching for these birds just in case they may crap on me. I got pooped on once before and had a nightmare another time, (i cried in that nightmare and woke up screaming)my top 5 would be spiders(bugs) vomit, seaguls, people who crapped urinated themselves and dead animals/people.
- Break Up and Divorce - My first love broke my heart in june. After 7 months apart we got back together again for another 6 months and then we happened to separate again. I guess if you broke up you broke up for a reason and you really shouldnt be going after that person again.I made taht mistake, and hopefully it wouldnt happen again. Even though it's hard for me to get over him..I wont take him back! no matter how much it hurts me>.
- Self-Injury - I've stopped since last year, and I really dont want to relaps..but there's always the temptation to cut my wrist every now and then..
Euphoria-koiobito's Story
I've always been the ugly duckling in my family. NO one really had any of the same inrterests as me or anything. I didnt really have good friends at my old school, but I felt like it was worse when I moved. People spread mean things about me and I just hated it. I came to this new high school now and I have alot of really good friends. I had a boyfriend for 6 months before he broke my heart in june.. He was my first love and I'm very sensitive so it's taking a while for me to get over this. Not a lot of people liked him and told me that I could do better but they doont kno how good he was to me and how much love i felt from him. Not only that, but for a couple years my parents have only been argueing but now they're actually getting divorced, I dont really mind it. I hate my dad, but it always seems to make me sad in the end. I've never been really happy since I broke up with my boyfriend.. My parents no matter how much they 'try' they can never fully understand what Im going through and always try to make me something they werent. They're like those competetive parents who want their children to be perfect and to be a star and all, but not in that sense.They dont understand my weaknesses and act like Im making up an excuss to avoid any work when infact, I just cant do it. It hurts me emotionally to live with them, I really cant stand anyone but my older brother. He's the only one I ever say 'I love you' to and he's the only one I mean it to. But I think that everyone just thinks higher of me and when I come up short; they cant say'at least you tried' they'd compare me to some one who did better and call me stupid and they dont look on both sides of the story. It hurts me so much.
Euphoria-koiobito's Blogs
Euphoria-koiobito has 15 blogs. [view all]
- The things people do.. - Thu, September 04, 2008 - [view]
I'm surprized I'm here, at grade 11. It feels like just the other day I was still meeting my best friends and just meeting everyone I know. But it's been almost three years since then. which amazes me. We only have 2 more years including this one, for my friends and I. I'ts kinda scary, (but I'm staying an extra year so I dont have to freak out in grade 12). My friends and I... - Once again - Fri, June 13, 2008 - [view]
It's been such a long time. I should have been updating but I got caught up in my life so yea... Well My ex and I have tried to give it another shot, going again for another 6 months. but then we seemed disconnected and eventually broke up again. I'm much stronger now. I didnt cry or care all that much. It's just that when you break up, girls are more emotional, while the guy takes ... - Your eyes open - Sun, January 20, 2008 - [view]
Well, lately me and my ex have been hanging out more. We talk more and everything between us is good:) We had a nice conversation about the situation and Thank God! the very thing I wanted him to see has jumped out and slapped him in the face with guilt!!>:D He had finally realized what a horrible person he's been to me over the past 3 months. He apologized for it and it seemed... - When I thought it was all over - Wed, December 12, 2007 - [view]
It bothers me that there's sstill a 'situation' with my ex and I. I dont know what has corrupted his mind to think that I still like him ( I hope he knows from since he got a new girlfriend to make me angry, I got the message) But ontop of that he hates me and likes to tell everyone how annoying i am and how much i still love him and all that jazz It sickens me>_> His new girl is trying t... - Clearing - Wed, November 28, 2007 - [view]
I'm so calm:)I found a peace at which I dont care and care(neutral). I suppose I'm happy. The people I wasnt talking to fpr a while Im friends with again, and most of my problems are disappearingI guess things are better.