Veightwo's Profile
- Sex: Male
- Age: 25
- Location:
Montreal, Canada, 99999
Issues Veightwo is Interested In
- Environmental Allergy - Makes spring and summer LOADS of fun !! YAY !
- Social Anxiety Disorder - It's not to the point where i can't function but i do get nervous about really really stupid things. Like how my voice might sound to others or what other will think of my laugh if i laugh out loud. Or am i walking strangely? I used to run a bit weirdly when i was a kid and people laughed at it. Crazy how the things of the past affect you long after.
- Stress - Advanced University courses i completely hate, not being accepted into the program i tried to transfer to. twice. the inability to find a job, everyone around me finding this "love" i believed didn't exist, lingering skin problems, very possible future hair problems... Oh what nice cards you've dealt me fate!!
- Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD) - I guess it's happened so much that anytime someone stops calling or keeping in contact for a short period of time I immediately think they've decided they were tired of me and moved on. But then I'm not sure if this is paranoia since in most cases it's usually true. People keep friends while they need them, once they don't they move on to more useful friends.
- Depression - Can't say it's clinical, but lately it's causing a bit of sleeping problems, and i feel a bit sick. it's more of a mix between sad and angry though. found out recently my younger (21 yr old) brother had a girlfriend. He never had to work for anything and it's pissing me off or making me sad... I don't really know. I'm just reminded of my many unrequited loves of the past. And feel as though I've failed as an older brother.
- Low Self Esteem - One thing causes another, which in turn causes another, and over the years it develops into other things. I immediately assume that people will not like me no matter who they are. Maybe that's why I've forced myself not to fall for anyone over the last 2 years. I don't think i have what it takes for anyone to like me. I do believe in some of my abilities though. I'm a master of procrastination (is that good?), and a fast learner.
- Hair Loss - All men on my mother's side have genetic hair loss. Mine's starting to thin out, and i fear for the worst. Ever since i got a hair cut and was told "your hair is a bit thinner" I've become completely paranoid and see any small thing as a sign that I'm gonna be completely bald.
Veightwo's Story
I've started thinking only recently that maybe the feelings I'm having are not normal. Maybe i really do have a problem. I tend not to blend in to much with people of my age (at least not with the people in my university program) because I like movies obsessively, video games, and anime. I tend to worry and care a little bit too much about people, so when they don't contact me for a long time i become worried to the point where i don't feel like doing anything.
People tell me I'm a good looking guy, but i always have a hard time believing them for some reason. I ignore the good and see only the bad. the 10+ rejections from girls i liked doesn't help.
apart from problems, I'm an artist turned programmer turned teacher turned computer artist. I had given up on art as i thought i wasn't good enough, went to programming, became an excellent programmer, got a diploma in computer science, and realized it wasn't for me. After a recent studio art course I decided to try art again and i find a certain ease at learning it, and more then enough creativity to back it up.
also: is it just me or do alot of depressed people like anime and/or some form of art? Does increased creativeness cause other mental issues? Does it allow us to make up stupid scenarios in our head that other people don't?
Maybe I'm here looking for help. I don't know. I never ask for it, and don't expect it. I hope someone can find comfort in me, because that alone makes me feel better.
Veightwo's Blogs
Veightwo has 2 blogs. [view all]
- What most cannot see. - Sat, May 17, 2008 - [view]
I kinda like this website. It's a place where you can safely complain about all your troubles without having some idiot saying "wah wah wah quit crying" or "lol emo". You get so tired of going around pretending to be happy and that everything is fine because you don't want people to go around giving you their horribly bad advice which you know they have no idea what ... - eUseless - Fri, May 16, 2008 - [view]
so I heard about this crap website on TV, the get to meet your perfect match one, and they were having a "contact your matches for free" weekend soon or something, so i went and filled in the basic "free" profile. I Tried to be as broad as i could be but still stick to my personal preferences, and here's my final result! : Unfortunately, we ar...