bipolar_polarbear88's Profile
- Sex: Female
- Age: 21
- Location:
90007
Issues bipolar_polarbear88 is Interested In
bipolar_polarbear88's Story
I have suffered from depression and I still do, I have experienced hallucinations. I have been raped, and with that I feel that everyone is watching me. When I was 14 years old I started to binge and purge, I would skip meals and exercise obsessively. When I was 15 years old I started to cut. I tried to kill myself at 16, I started drinking and smoking when I was 16. I tried to move on from all of those things but they somewhat haunt me. I wish most of the time that I can just truly pretend that they never happened. My family is oblivious to all this, except the time that I ended in the hospital. I miss my old therapist and I wish I never left treatment. Now with financial problems and forced to have hasty decisions I am overwhelmed.
bipolar_polarbear88's Blogs
bipolar_polarbear88 has 17 blogs. [view all]
- Working with others - Sat, January 30, 2010 - [view]
I feel lost and confused. I work with other people who intimidate me. They want to meet with me, probably to tell me how I am doing a terrible job which I am. I am not doing my job. I just want to focus on my studies and nothing more. It is unfortunate for those who just want to get the degree and not interact with others because you simply do not want to. I think that people have a problem wit... - I might have something else going on - Sat, September 20, 2008 - [view]
The world is leaving me. There are spinning movements and I am not going with it. For them it is normal to go at that speed. I am scared at the fact that there are people going about in that pace. I am in the middle of things and I see the world move on without me. Thinking about doing as I want makes me crazy by their definition. I need to feed my impulses. I cannot control my mind or my physi... - Secret out - Fri, August 01, 2008 - [view]
My parents found out that I smoke. I don't feel guilty about that, I know I will if they start throwing it on my face all time or if I hear them coughing. - Brother - Fri, August 01, 2008 - [view]
I have a brother that is in prison and I always wait too long to write him back. I don't know why. He's very important to me because it means so much that I do write. When I do write to him it makes me feel really guilty that he's been waiting for my response. I think I am oblivious to when I am depressed. There was a time were I would write to him almost everyday, I ... - not so personal anymore - Thu, July 10, 2008 - [view]