kaeia's Profile
- Sex: Female
- Age: 22
- Location:
32712
Issues kaeia is Interested In
- Depression - It gets hard to get up in the morning. I'm in constant pain because I eat to feel better and feel worse when I realize what I've done. I'm at least 50 lbs overweight and I've only realized recently that I'm starting to get a chubby stomach. I keep thinking I want to end it but I know I won't because there is someone who loves me and I would never selfishly cause him pain.
- Sexual Abuse - I can't sleep with anyone without having nightmares of what happened to me. I've also become emotionally clingy and have the assumption that the other person is going to feel there is something wrong with me and leave. I won't say I'm not a handful to the people I date. I'm terrified to be anywhere alone (including my own home) because I think that something terrible will happen to me.
- Low Self Esteem - Goes with the territory I guess
kaeia's Story
I have told people this but not many... When I was 13 my mom's best friends' stepson (we'll just say he's my "cousin") molested me and would've raped me had his sister not come upstairs. This situation would be hard for any girl but being that I had just become comfortable with myself and only went through puberty a few years earlier, I didn't know what to do. I couldn't tell anyone because I thought he could just say I wanted to have sex and they'd believe him. I was scared and I didn't even tell my mom till about two years ago. Since then I have developed a small social phobia; I go places but never by myself. I had to drive one city over by myself to go to a friends house and I had a panic attack in my bathroom while I was dressing. I called said friend crying to please come to me... I am forever terrified he will come back and finish the job so to speak.
Fast forward to a year ago... I was dating this guy for about a year and a half and we had gotten pretty comfortable with each other but I decided I wanted to break it off. He became irrational and almost drove us off the road. I promptly ended it once I got home safely. Couple weeks later I met a guy, an amazing guy. He was funny and nice and didn't care so much that I was in a wheelchair. My ex starts calling two weeks into our dating. He wants to be friends and I stupidly thought it would be okay. I still had some of his stuff so I let him come over to retrieve it and I left it on the counter. He comes in and sweet talks me for a few minutes and goes to pick up his stuff but instead sits with me on the couch. I'm nervous by this time but I say nothing. He starts getting friendly and touching me and I push him but still I say nothing. He proceeds to take my top and rape me. I almost didn't think it was rape because he didn't get to finish on his end but I was told according to state law it still counts. I told the police and know what they did? They had me sit in the middle of a hallway telling my story in front of everyone. I promptly said forget it and turned to leave. But not before leaving a statement for the cops to check out. I now suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts and slight social phobia.
kaeia's Blogs
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