singingconfession's Profile
- Sex: Female
- Age: 16
- Location:
Graham, WA 98338
Issues singingconfession is Interested In
- Depression - There are times when I go to a dark place. One minute I'll be laughing and having fun, and the next I'll be drowning myself in depressing music, trying to talk myself out of doing something stupid. It makes it really hard when I'm around my friends. I will be in this deep dark place and it is so hard to pretend I'm ok. I don't know how to make the feeling go away besides just waiting or sleeping it off.
- Insomnia - I don't like to sleep at night. I usually get wide awake around 11pm. Then I can be hyper until around 2am. Then I will be in my cool down period until about 3am. That's when I can finally go to sleep. Even on school days. I have to struggle to stay awake during school.
- Stress - I'm a very non confrontational person. I hold things in. Eventually I have an emotional breakdown and get really angry and depressed. I can get antisocial and it makes my friends and family upset.
- Self-Injury - I used to cut. I think of self-injury as an addiction. Because like drug or alcohol addiction, it take alot of willpower to get passed it. I carve when I feel like I want to cut. It's less dangerous and less noticable.
- Hyperhidrosis - I got Hyperhidrosis from my mom although hers is less severe. I don't like being in social situations in case I start to sweat through my shirt. It's really embarassing. I always have to watch what colors I wear of what kind of fabrics. I want to have surgery to fix it, but it costs $5,000-$10,000. We just don't have that kind of money.
- Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) - I think my dad suffers from NPD. He refuses to get help though. He doesn't think anything is wrong with him. He thinks he's always right and makes people feel guilty when they put their own life and family before him. It causes a huge rift between me and him, and between us and the rest of my family.
- Panic Attacks - As I said before, my dad gets angry alot. I usually only get panic attacks when he yells at me. It sucks. It's another thing I got from my mom. Luckily I don't get them as bad as her.
singingconfession's Story
I just moved to Graham with my dad. I live with him. My mom lives close, but I never see her because my stepdad isn't exactly the best person. Neither is my dad. Although he only physically abused me once many years ago, he is a bit emotionally abusive. Sometime last year I got really depressed and started cutting. Only one of my best friends knew about it. When she went to a mental hospital for cutting, I stopped because I was afraid the same thing would happen to me. I still to this day carve little pictures in my skin where no one can see them.
I try to look for the positives in life, but it's hard. The easiest way is to just laugh about it and make fun of it. Some people mistake that for extreme sarcasm.
singingconfession's Blogs
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